Happy Birthday to Me!

 

I haven't written anything here for quite a while, partly because I've been busy with other things, but mostly because the memories which come back to me when I write about what was the darkest period of my life, are so intense, so visceral, that I find myself shaking, aching, sweat poring off me and the taste of a man in my mouth. And that is just the memories, the dreams, all in my mind, but I have a physical reaction to them which left me draimed after the last piece that I had to leave it alone for a while.

My 13th birthday was actually marked by a party and a cake. The party was more for the three guys who had rented me for the night, and the cake was from Amsterdam which, as far as I can remember, was already a place where tourists could buy marijuana cakes and cookies and wash them down with spiced coffee, but I've never been there so it is all just hearsay.

Mel, who had driven me to an address on the South Side of Glasgow, told me they were business men celebrating the closure of a deal, but when I saw them I thought they looked more like gangsters, probably drug dealers, and knew I was going to be in for a hard time. the three all had shaved heads and looked like the kind of Russians we saw on cheap videos; as it turned out, they were all Glaswegians, but they still looked like gansters to me: burly, hard looking men in their forties or fifties, with the hardened eyes of men who wouldn't lose any sleep if they killed me. But as Mel was fond of saying: "the customer is always right, and remember, if they like you and we get return bookings, there's a bonus in it for you," not that I would ever see the money, that always went to Mel. We girls never received a penny, we had nothing but the clothes he gave us, especially, no mobiles - that meant no way of contacting anyone, or organising an escape. We were just meat, to be sold and used, over and over again. But I had learned that keeping the customers happy was the best way to survive, even when we would be glad of the release of death. Mel didn't want to lose us, we were his cash crop, like cows on a dairy farm, to be milked over and over again.

One of the guys gave Mel a packet - the cash sum already agreed, - and he left, promising to be back at 10am to collect me. There I was, on my 13th birthday, with three strangers, intent on having a good time. And I was the entertainment.

Luckily, they were fairly decent to me. They all wanted to fuck and quickly agreed on an order for the first course of their meal. The oldest-looking got me to kneel on the floor and he had me doggy-style, he didn't waste any time on preliminaries, but he did at least use a lubricant - probably for his own comfort than mine, but it meant he penetrated my smoothly, held my hips tight, and shagged me for a few minutes before he came and filled me with his spunk. The second guy put me on my back and knelt between my legs, which he held up high and wide, gripping my ankles tightly as he entered me and shoved hard, pushing me slightly across the carpet each time and then pulling me back. I guessed I would have carpet-burns before the night was over. After he had cum, the third had me the same way, but he kept taking out his cock and then re-inserting it, this seemed to go on fer ages, but my sense of time was all to pot, until he too shot his load into me. But that was only the beginning!

They decided to have a three-way. One lay on the floor and they put me on top of him, and he slid his cock into my see you next tuesday, while another knelt between his legs and penetrated my bum - thankfully lubricating me and his cock first, and the third knelt over the first one's head and put his cock into my mouth and telling me to suck, I did as I was told and then the three started moving in unison, fucking my three holes in a steady rhythm

which seemed to last forever till the one in my mouth told them to get ready, as he was about to cum. They synchronised their thrusts and all managed to cum at almost exactly the same time. The one fucking my mouth shot his load down my throat and held my head tight, with his cock deep in my throat, making sure that I couldn't spit any of it out. As I swallowed the other two ejaculated up me.

 Then they phoned for carry-outs and ordered me a fish supper which I tore into and ate like I was starving, which I probably was. I even thanked them for it.

Mel came late, about 12.30, by which time they had each fucked me individually again and then produced the dog. I had thought I heard faint barking but in most parts of the city you can always hear at least one dog, and sometimes a chorus of howls, especially if there's a bitch on heat. At least this wasn't a Pit Bull or anything like that. I'm not much use at the different makes of dog, but I did recognise a labrador and that made me relax, cos I'd heard they were good, gentle dogs, the kind you can have with kids, but this one looked as if he was up for something special, the size of a schlong on him. They got him to lick me, which he seemed really keen on, probably with the smell and taste of all the cum up me. Now I knew why they hadn't let me wash after they fucked me. I thought it was cos they liked fucking up a spermy see you next Tuesday, and bum, but now I realised it was for Fido or whatever his name was. I always find dogs tongues tickly but at least that relaxed me, and I was giggling a fair bit, which they seemed to like and they were having a good laugh as well. Then they put me on some cushions, kneeling so the dog could take me in it's natural position and one of them helped guide it's cock up me, then it really went like the clappers! Gripping me with it's front legs it really gave me a pounding and boy, I don't know how many thrusts a second, but it was like a steam piston and I knew my knees were gonna be burned as well as my back. Every now and then it licked my back and had a breather, then got back to it. The guys were all jabbering away in whatever their language was and sometimes shouting and I noticed one had a stop-watch, they were timing the dog

When it shot it's load up me, one of them, the fattest, clapped his hands and cheered and then the money changed hands! They'd been betting on how long the dog could go before it came. I've heard the Chinese like to bet on anything but I'd never heard of this before. Well, at least that's over, I thought. But after a few minutes the dog's cock was wagging again and this time I had to lie on my back on the cushions so the dog could fuck my throat. And i thought, it's just come one load this is going to take forever - and it felt like it, One of the guys stood over the dog and kind of kept it from backing out of me, and it must have been used to this, cos it held me wrapped in its front legs again, sometimes nuzzling and licking between my legs, and thrusting away for all it was worth. The stop-watch was out again and when it shot it's second load down my throat one of the other guys cheered, and he collected his winnings.

Now I wonderd what the one who hadn't won would want done to me so he could try to win back his money and I didn't have long to wait. there was a lot of jabbering and then he slammed down a wad on the table. The others added theirs and then this third guy made me stand up, bend over and hold my ankles, and slathered some jelly or something on my bum and see you next Tuesday, pushed my feet further apart so mu cheeks were a bit wider and with one guy in front of me, (he gave me his cock to suck) and the other holding the stopwatch, the one who'd lost twice put his cock up my see you next Tuesday, then pulled it out and stuck it in my bum, then changed again and soon worked up a rhythm for himself, in. out. in, out, in, out, and I quickly lost track of how many times he poked me or how long it was taking; he kept up some kind of mantra to himself, but I had no idea what the bet could be - was it how quickly or how long he would be, no idea. And the one in front of me was into the same rhythm, except his cock never came out of my mouth, just pulled back a bit then forced down my throat. I was glad my nose wasn't stuffed up or I wouldn't have been able to breath. And because of the way I was standing, I kinda rocked backwards and forwards, depending on which one was thrusting. They were holding on to me, one pulling my arms, the other my head, or I would have fallen over,

then the one behind me began to count down from 10, I can't remember the numbers but some of them sounded vaguely familiar and I could tell he was planning on shooting his load as soon as he got below 1 - and he did, but not inside me. No, he had pulled his cock out and shot it all over my back and bum cheeks, and at the same time, the one in front had pulled his out and shot it over my face and hair. When they let go, I did just fall over and tried to hold back from crying, but I couldn;t help it. My throat was very sore and scratchy, my bum and see you next Tuesday were raw and I was covered in their spunk. They threw my clothes at me and one told me to get dressed, he said Mel was on his way, but I don't know how they knew, unless they had arranged it with him. When I fell I had knocked over an ashtray and all the ash was sticking to me and some of the butts, though Iwas able to knock them off.

I was just dressed when there was a ring at the doorbell and one of them let Mel in. He was grinning and glad-handing them while I felt filthy and sore, with the carpet burns and then my fall, but Mel told me to shut it or else, so I bit my lip and bottled it up. Five minutes later we were in the van and driving through the city. I could see people out on the streets, having fun and partying, and all I wanted was a bath and something to put me to sleep. I got a glass of vodka when we got back to the flat, but there wasn't any hot

water so I just crawled into my sleeping bag and fell asleep, exhausted. At some point in the night I crawled through to the bathroom and puked into the toilet, a mixture of fish and chips, vodka and slimy cum that had all boiled up in my belly. After that and rinsing my mouth and my face with

cold water, I crawled back to my bed and crashed out till later in the day.
Angry and ashamed, angry at myself for ever having allowed myself to be sucked into this life of squalor and filth, angry with my Mum and Dad for not having found me and rescued me, which probably meant they were glad to be rid of me, angry at all the men who had used and abused my body, and ahsamed that I had either not had the brains to escape, run away from Mel and all the others, nor the strength to end it all and escape into the oblivion of death. I knew that if I really wanted to badly enough, there would be ways of doing that. Maybe painful, but the pain would soon end forever, so, I reasoned with myself, I couldn't want out badly enough, which meant I only deserved everything I got and that doubled my shame because it made me an accomplice.